Nikki Glaser punches up, laterally and at herself

It didn’t take long for Nikki Glaser to take shots at Syracuse during a soldout Crouse Hinds Theater performance on Friday night.

“I looked up fun things to do in Syracuse and it gave me the suicide hotline,” Glaser said. “Your airport is the nicest bus stop I’ve been to.”

The opening salvos had Syracuse fans roaring from the start of Glaser’s 80-minute “Alive and Unwell Tour” set.

The comedian who gained popularity in part to her roast of Tom Brady earlier this year covered a wide swath of topics during Friday’s show: from benign jokes like her love for Taylor Swift to more bawdy ones about her favorite kind of porn to watch (gang bangs that feature words of encouragement for the receiver).

Glaser’s sexual proclivities, or lack thereof, were a common theme throughout the night. At one point, talking about how robots might take over the world and how her Roomba would be the first thing to turn on her, which she quickly turned into a self-pleasuring joke.

“My Roomba’s going to turn on me, and when it does, I hope starts with my pussy,” Glaser chided.

An ongoing gag the comedian has made on talk shows and podcasts is the lack of sex she has with her boyfriend, a topic which she trojan horsed into her set under the guise of spray tans.

“When you get a spray tan you smell like a menstrual cup, no one want’s to get close to you,” she said to affirming cheers from the audience. “My boyfriend will not sleep in the same bed as me when I have a spray tan … and that’s why I keep getting them.”

There were a few moments in the night when she lost her momentum with the crowd, notably during a prolonged bit about not wanting to have kids, which seemed to drag on — almost as if she had lost her place and stalled for time to regather her thoughts.

But when the comedian righted herself, it became clear she was playing the long con — and the audience was hit with whiplash as her next set of jokes was about Casey Anthony and JonBenét Ramsey.

Later in the night, though, audience support did wean when Glaser talked about how the r-word is making a comeback, “gay people call themselves gay, so we can’t use it as an insult. But r——ed people don’t even call themselves r——ed, so why can’t we have it?”

As the show closed, it was clear Glaser’s bold, unapologetic style left Syracuse with plenty to talk about. You can catch the comedian on tour through 2025.